God these a fucking funny.....
Chuck Norris List: 100 Chuck Norris Facts
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Chuck Norris once roundhouse kicked someone so hard that his foot broke the speed of light, went back in time, and killed Amelia Earhart while she was flying over the Pacific Ocean.-Chuck Norris recently had the idea to sell his urine as a canned beverage. We know this beverage as Red Bull. -If you can see Chuck Norris, he can see you. If you can't see Chuck Norris you may be only seconds away from death.
-The chief export of Chuck Norris is pain. -Chuck Norris' tears cure cancer. Too bad he has never cried. -Chuck Norris once shot a German plane down with his finger, by yelling, "Bang!" -When Chuck Norris plays Oregon Trail his family does not die from cholera or dysentery, but rather roundhouse kicks to the face. He also requires no wagon, since he carries the oxen, axels, and buffalo meat on his back. He always makes it to Oregon before you. -Chuck Norris does not sleep. He waits. -The quickest way to a man's heart is with Chuck Norris' fist. -What was going through the minds of Chuck Norris' victims before they died? His shoe. -Chuck Norris once showed up at Google and demanded that they rename their search engine "Chuck Norris." When they refused, Chuck roundhouse kicked Google in the face, transforming it's bruised remains into
Google Dark. -Chuck Norris affects the price of stock quotes and land values. Wherever he is, prices drop due to the danger of a sudden catastrophe. He bought his own home for 30 cents and one roundhouse kick. -If you spell Chuck Norris in Scrabble, you win. Forever. -The following is a short list of things Chuck Norris cannot do: . -If you make a list of 10 things Chuck Norris cannot do, he will appear at your house and perform them all. Your life may be forfeit. -Chuck Norris once taught a class called "Ass Kicking 101". There were no survivors. -Chuck Norris does not hunt because the word hunting implies the possibility of failure. Chuck Norris goes killing. -When the
Boogeyman goes to sleep every night he checks his closet for Chuck Norris. -Chuck Norris can slam revolving doors. -The Big Bang was actually Chuck Norris roundhouse kicking God in the face. -Chuck Norris has to maintain a concealed weapon license in all 50 states in order to legally wear pants. -Chuck Norris Isn't funny, stop laughing. -Chuck Norris has an unbeatable poker face, concealed beneath an even more unbeatable poker beard. -While a normal poker face conceals the emotion of its wearer, Chuck Norris’s poker face skips all that and just drives other players insane. As a result, the only way to survive a game of poker against Chuck Norris is to play online, and even then
you still might go insane.
Im sure many of you have read these, but you must admit they're funny.
Since Ive been back from Vegas shit has been wonderful. First off tara got a spot on this new reality show comin out soon called the The Stlylist, not to mention they fucking love the girl. What can I say she's amazing :) . Julias in Hawaii at them moment and lovin every damn day of it...... One thing I definately must try are these babies right here.
GOD! Don't they look amazing, its not sushi, its seaweed rice and spam mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm. ME? Ive just been stuck here in Hollywood skating, working, and chillen with the rest of my posse. I have a little bit of footage from neck faces art show last week, but im at work so it wont be up till later tonight when i get home.
SOME MORE GOOD NEWS : Stooph comes back at thee end of next month. You can only imagine how fucking excited I am. Yes she will be living with me, and yes we have big plans for our new room.
Im going to buy some black and white film next week and I want to shoot some photos of anyone if their down , just let me know. Call me or something. It's a shame the summer is almost over but im definatly ready for the winter and the cute jackets i want to get.
This ones fucking sick, its my favorite. It has a hood and it looks like you can detach it if youd like, and look at the cute sleeves they get a little poofy at thee end. Sadly its 940 fucking dollars, hurts the heart doesnt it.
Ari and Emma came down from the desert last night. They're two of my best friends who used to live across the street from me. We skated all evening and then we tried to make it to sunset junction but we were all a lil too faded, hehe. The Black Keys are playing tonight at 8:30 they're pretty damn good if anyone wants to check em out, should be fun. You can find sunset junction where Santa Monica and Sunset meet. Alright im done.
